Job Interview Questions: How does this sound after a job interview?

Somebody said it would be a good idea to thank him for his time
sooo how does this sound? Sports & Wellness is a gymThank you for the opportunity you gave me to interview for the
Hospitality Desk Associate position and also Thank you so much for taking
time from your busy schedule to meet with me the other day.
Sports & Wellness seems like a wonderful place to work I would very
much like to be part of the Sports & Wellness team.
I will look forward to your decision.

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Recommended Answer:
You are missing a period after "wonderful place to work"

Thank you should only be capitalized if it is the beginning of a sentence

also, sounds robotic.

Lastly, you need to pose your working there as a benefit for the gym, not for yourself.

Instead of saying "I would like to be a part of the team" you should say " I look forward to providing excellent service to your customers" or something like that. The main idea here is they don't care about helping you, only about how you can help them. All communication during the hiring process should be directed AT the company, not towards the benefits YOU will receive by being employed.

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• Ok this sounds dull and like every other letter that interviewer is going to get.
  
  Try this;
  
  Dear ********
  
  I would like to express my sincere gratitude, for your meeting with me to discuss the hospitality desk position you currently have available, I feel that my skills and abilities would be a benefit to your organization and your consumers, as i enjoy working with the public and offering outstanding customer service. Having met with you I feel that working for your dynamic organisation would offer me a promising career path and, that it would allow me to improve on my existing skills and allow me to develop new ones.
  
  Once again allow me to thank you ,for taking the time to meet with me in respect of my application, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.
  
  Kind Regards
  
  ****************